The Joke Thread!

[Dave]

I'll start... someone sent me this joke in an email tonight and seems as good of a place to start as any so here goes.......

Three men - a Canadian farmer, Osama bin Laden and a White Trash Biker are all walking together one day.They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it.

'I will give each of you one wish, which is three wishes in total', says the Genie. The Canadian says, 'I am a farmer and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada ' POOF! With the blink of the Genie's eye, the land in Canada was forever fertile for farming.

Osama was amazed, so he said, 'I want a wall around Afghanistan , Palestine , Iraq and Iran so that no infidels, Americans or Canadians can come into our precious land. 'POOF! Again, with the blink of the Genie's eye, there was a huge wall around those countries...

The Biker says, 'I am very curious. Please tell me more about this wall.' The Genie explains, 'Well, it's about 5,000 feet high, 500 feet thick and completely surrounds the country. Nothing can get in or out; it's virtually impenetrable.'

The Biker sits down on his Harley, cracks a beer, lights a cigar, smiles and says, 'Fill it with water.'

[XLFD]

Biker jokes; gotta love 'em. Here's a clean one-- must be, because it involves nuns.

Two nuns are riding their tandem bicycle along a rarely used path in Western Michigan. The one in back says "I've never come this way before." The one in front replies "Must be the cobblestones!"

[Tom Torquema]

Tom and his wife live in Toledo, Ohio.

One winter morning while listening to the radio, they hear the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through."

Tom's wife goes out and moves her car.

A week later while they are eating breakfast, the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through."

Tom's wife goes out and moves her car again.

The next week they are having breakfast again, when the radio announcer says "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park..........." then the electric power goes out.

Tom's wife is very upset, and with a worried look on her face she says, "Honey, I don't know what to do." Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snowplow can get through?

With the love and understanding in his voice like all men who are married to Blondes exhibit, Tom says,

"Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time?"

[Guidothesemipsuedocaptitalistpig]

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[Dave]

lol

[AQUAMAN]

Great one Guido.

[XLFD]

... and they are all riding bicycles down seldom used paths...