A Restorative Pilgrimage to Manitowoc and Back

[XLFD]

A year ago, on November 6, 2012 someone very special to me died; four days later I was able to share some of my feelings on the sad event:  a-personal-recollection-of-a-young-woman-that-died-too-soon.  Re-reading it once again takes me back to how much hurt I felt when I was writing it.  It's been a difficult year for all she affected during her short life, and the anniversary of it has been feared by many. 

Figuring out how to pay for funeral expenses when you don't have a lot of extra money can be difficult when a death comes out of nowhere.  Even with cremation and a lot of help from the pastor and the volunteers at Victoria's church, it still came out to about $3000 for everything involved with getting her a place for eternal rest and a proper sendoff.  The financial impact to me was substantial, but not nearly as bad as the emotional impact of the personal loss. 

I was offered some help at the time by her older sister and her husband to finance the purchase of the permanent headstone for her grave site.  For the greater part of a year, they have scraped up some of their extra cash while a temporary marker was in place, not unlike this:

 

 

It served its purpose as a marker, but was far less than what everyone wanted.  Which can be a problem when you have a few opinionated people that want to put their own best memory of the deceased down, particularly when they decide to get a picture embossed on it, and a few extra words.  After trying to decide democratically what to put on the marker, the purchasers eventually had to make the final decisions.   

Oddly enough, there was some pricing done on what this permanent grave marker would cost both locally and where Vikki's sister lived and the impetus in getting it soon was pushed back.  The costs were all pretty high, but while we were visiting our sister city of Manitowoc this summer, we dropped by the City's small zoo, north of the downtown, and my other half decided to check out a place selling grave markers directly across from it called Zabel Monuments.  They were very helpful, had nice products, and they turned out to be very economical.  A deal was struck shortly thereafter in September and the marker was made, saving hundreds of dollars from our first few estimates, even with factoring in the trip via the SS Badger to pick it up.

 

   

But then we ran into a problem.  It was the beginning of October and the season for the SS Badger to run was in its last week, and the marker was originally scheduled to be ready for pickup the day after the last voyage.  The crew at Zabel put our order on priority and had it ready with a few days to spare.  I turned out to be the only one able to make the trip to and from Manitowoc the day after, and so I brought a mini-cruise ticket for one the next day and got on board the SS Badger on a nice October morning

 

 

I had brought a hand truck with me as carry-on to transport the headstone the sixteen blocks from the monument place.  I realized it would be a difficult trek with the heavy granite stone and the odd looks I'd get, but I looked at it as sort of a pilgrimage in memory of Victoria that I would gladly endure for a much larger distance.  Plus it would be pointless to spend $150 more to bring a vehicle across and back for such a purpose.  The mists were lifting off Per Marquette Lake as I looked to the southeast behind the Badger's sister ship, the SS Spartan, in the pic above.

 

 

I had noticed a few workers wearing their navy blue uniforms  from Duke Energy, who were going across the lake so as to haul more wind turbines over for our state, and hoped to get a picture of them before we left with our own turbines in the background, but the mists helped botch the picture. 

 

 

After we got going and out of sight of Ludington, I decided to turn my attention on some material I brought along with me, but had a hard time concentrating on anything other than my somber quest.  I journeyed down to the central lounge and decided some good old Badger Bingo would keep my mind focused on something else.  I was lucky that morning even though I didn't manage to win any of the contests, for the Bingo caller was Ludington native, radio sportscaster and columnist, Todd "Scoop" Hansen.  If you've been fortunate enough to catch his act on the Badger, liberally peppered with some of the worst puns and jokes you've ever heard in one sitting, you'll remember it. 

 

 

Entering Manitowoc harbor, I knew my mission:  I would have to traverse 16 blocks with and without a big load within two hours.  It didn't seem too difficult, and after I disembarked, the trek to the monument place was done swiftly, so as to afford me the most time getting it back and on board in time.  The guys at Zabel welcomed me and gave me a surprise, that not only had I a headstone but a heavy concrete base to take back of which I hadn't heard about. 

Without a second thought, these good people said that they would throw both on their truck and take it down to the docks.  Not only did they load and unload the concrete and stone down at the carferry, they insisted on no extra charge for it. 

But the kind acts did not stop there, the carferry employees quickly found a spare cart for my cargo and wheeled it down below the stairs inside the hold.  Again, I was touched by them doing so with care and compassion, and without any call for monetary compensation.  It strengthened my faith in humanity, at least in the private sector.  I got on board shortly thereafter. 

 

 

On the way back, I again tried my hand at Badger Bingo, and won a couple times, getting a CD made by a Badger employee featuring Johnny Cash songs, and a sailor's cap for the kid.  I heard a few new jokes from "Scoop" but for some reason the repeated bad jokes actually seemed the funniest.  I took this picture looking back when we got in Ludington harbor, just before the Captain (who is not related to Howie Mandel) moved to the back of the ship.

 

 

My crew was waiting for me at the carferry docks, waiting to see me, but probably more curious as to how the headstone looked.  Once again, other members of the crew were very helpful in getting the cargo out and helped with loading it into the vehicle too.  By the end of the week, we finally were able to get a proper monument for the one we lost way too soon.  And so on the dreadful anniversary we just had, we could once again see her and be sad, yet proud.

 

[XLFD]

Back at you, Eastwick.  Unfortunately, our anniversary date featured rain throughout the whole day, dampening our plans for that day.  As Vikki would say, someone up above was very sad on that day.

[XLFD]

Thank you, EyE.

[XLFD]

The words are from her favorite movie series, the Twilight saga.  I can't personally sit through them, my guy card recoils at the thought of vampires that sparkle in sunlight and don't have Eastern European accents.  The song is sweet, however, 2000 years is not enough. 

My greatest loss I have had this year is when my telephone auto-erased my last voice mail from Victoria, a simple message about her having missed running into me earlier, that closed with a simple epithet "Love you, papa."  Those were her last words to me, preserved in my phone the night before she died.

[AQUAMAN]

There is a very old stone/marble quarry there in Manitowoc since forever, glad you found it X. What a noble and everlasting loving tribute your family made in purchasing this headstone. Just beautiful! God had a special purpose for taking Victoria early, only the "best die young", and us mortals here on earth, can only ponder, and yes, celebrate in the end, cause, there is nothing else we as earthlings can do. She is looking down right now I know, and in heart-filled appreciation and gladness. Thanks for the update and courageous actions for all concerned.

[Dave]

I"m sure she would be touched by the excellent tribute... no doubt how much you and her other family members loved her :-)

[Willy]

It's hard to believe a whole year has already past. Wonderful story about the monument, X.

[XLFD]

Thanks one and all, I hope they have access to the Ludington Torch at where she's at so she can read your nice comments.  But would it truly be heaven if you didn't have access to the Ludington Torch, and learn the latest inside story of our heaven-on-Earth area?  A question for our metaphysicists to contemplate.